Sins Of Restaurant Service

In a city with so many well-run restaurants, I always find it a bit shocking when I have a meal out that is so epically bad that it leaves me wondering, "What the heck is going on in this establishment?"

I recently scoped out a newer gastropub that opened last fall. An outstanding menu, ample outdoor space and enticing beer and cocktail offerings made it a great option for a mid-week summer night. From service to food quality to pacing, the entire experience was very unfortunate.

While I'm not going to spend this post dissecting what went wrong, the experience did get me thinking about the deadly sins of restaurant service. These are the things that make me crazy when I'm dining out. Granted, this meal didn't have all of the faux pas outlined below, but it was definitely batting .500.

1.  If our water glass is empty, we have a problem. I probably should have seen the writing on the wall when it took 15 minutes for us to even get water the other night.

Overripe, mealy tomatoes make for a caprese disaster.
What a mess. 

2. If it's not fresh, don't serve it. If it's overripe, don't serve it. If the protein seems questionable, don't serve it. If a restaurant doesn't want to deal with these fundamentals, then it should strip down the menu, rebrand itself as a bar and start serving frozen chicken fingers.

3. Don't bring the appetizer at the same time as the entree.  An appetizer is an appetizer for a reason, so pace it accordingly.

4. "Are you ready to order yet?" "Are you ready now?" "Are you done yet?" "Do you want dessert?" The last question is my favorite, especially when we're still working on our entrees. I totally understand and appreciate a restaurant's need to turn tables, I really do. Even if the food is outstanding, though, rushing a diner out ruins the experience.

'"Lay off me, I'm starving!" Don't
comment on how much a
patron orders. 

5. So let's just say it's winter, and the Chicago Bears have lost a particularly devastating playoff game. And, let's just say that three hungry, mildly over-served Bears fans are looking to drown their sorrows in some deep dish on a frigid Sunday night. Making comments such as, "Wow, you guys sure ordered a lot of food for just the three of you..." and "You sure must like to eat" are totally unnecessary. Maybe we want leftovers? Maybe I like to try a lot of different things? Maybe it's none of your business?!  

6. When things aren't going well, managers should acknowledge the issue and do what they can to right the experience. No, a shot of Old Crow will not make me feel better, please just bring me my caprese salad. And, in what universe does a shot of Old Crow go with a caprese salad anyway? (Yes, this actually happened.)

What restaurant service sins make you crazy?